Wednesday, July 5, 2023

Last Annual Heart of the South Race Report

I recorded an audio version of this race report, just in case you'd rather listen than read! To listen to this race report, click hereThis audio is different than the video compilation of my various recordings, which is at the end. 

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I was miserable about 40% of the time. I cried. I swore. I quit twice.

I was joyful about 20% of the time. I rallied. I laughed. I danced.

I was neutral about 40% of the time. I walked. I ate. I slept.

The Last Annual Heart of the South 350-mile journey run from Fig, North Carolina, to Castle Rock, Georgia took me 9 days, 2 hours, and 11 minutes. As much as I wanted to quit during the event, I am so glad I kept moving forward and my friends and Jan, the meatwagon driver, kept me from that. But anywayyyy, here is my insanely long race report of my vacation without a car!

Pre-Race

One aspect that really made me excited about The Last Annual Heart of the South (HOTS) is that you don’t know where the start of the race is until you get there. You know where you’ll finish, on top of Sand Mountain on The Rock in Castle Rock, Georgia, which is where The Last Annual Vol State (LAVS) finishes as well. LAVS [link to my 2022 race report] has a set route every single year and there are well-known road angels and road angel stops that are iconic and absolute beloved by the runners.

HOTS? There’s none of that. And even more exciting was that the route wasn’t going to be published for the public when the race started, it would only be revealed as runners traveled it. This meant that every twelve hours (after check-in) that the route would show up. It greatly benefitted the back of the pack runners who got road angel support, whereas the front of the pack didn’t. We did have a few tidbits of information going in:

  • There was a great biscuit place less than a mile into the route and we could place our biscuit orders just after the last supper
  • It was rumored that there was a 30+ mile food desert right at the beginning
  • There were three places on the route that cars couldn’t go and we would have to finish those segments prior to being picked up if we needed the meat wagon.
  • If we wanted to see something cool, we needed to bring $10 for admission for that thing

 

The Ride to the Start

Bright and early on Wednesday morning, we all made our way to The Barn at Castle Rock to say goodbye to our cars and load up into the bus. Because HOTS is smaller, they don’t have to reserve two full busses, but instead had a large bus and a smaller transport vehicle. The bus ride at LAVS follows the course in reverse, but HOTS couldn’t do that (it became very obvious why later) and the nearest hotel would be at least an hour from the start.

The energy on the bus was electric when we came up to various exits on the highway. People guessed Florida, Illinois, and West Virginia as our starting locations. After about 30 minutes the bus went north and a cheer arose among the participants as we got yet another clue to where the start would be. It continued like that, each exit and turn eliciting a response and people looking at their phones to see where we were at that present moment.

Shortly before noon the bus pulled into the Gray Fossil Site (https://gfs.visithandson.org/) museum and discovery center in Gray, Tennessee. So still in Tennessee, but near enough to the northeast border of the state. Laz told us we would be stopping there for lunch and Carl was picking it up. In addition to the lunch, we would be staying there until 3pm so we could explore the museum. It was really neat and I made hand and butt prints on the giant pin thingy (as one does). The museum it was an active dig site where researchers were digging, filtering, and piecing together fossils of mastodons, tapirs, and other ancient creatures.







At 3pm we all loaded back onto the bus, eager to see where we would be heading to next! Ten minutes later we pulled into a hotel. I repeat, TEN MINUTES LATER, we pulled into the hotel. So, that’s where we were staying. The largest city in the area with a hotel was Johnson City, Tennessee and we were basically chilling at the museum until hotel check-in time. It was absolutely HILARIOUS.

Also, I need to note this – there is a song called WagonWheel (opens Spotify) that has, “But he's a-headin' west from the Cumberland Gap, To Johnson City, Tennessee” and someone mentioned it on that bus. And I will never forgive them for it. Luckily, I don’t remember who, so my hate is directed at the song. I had this song stuck in my head for the entire event except in Bluff City and another city when I had my own song creation in my head. It also doesn’t help that so many people had wagon wheels in their yards as decorations which would automatically have the song in my head again.

I was assigned my roommate for the night and hilariously it was Kim Drake. Kim is an absolute gem of a human and is signed up for the Triple Crown of journey runs, HOTS, LAVS, and, new this year, Third Circle of Hell. The funny part is that last year at LAVS a guy Greg that I ran with thought Kim was me and was telling Kim stories about herself. Then at the museum earlier that day, another guy called Kim by my name, so it was cemented that we are exactly the same person (I wish, she is amazing!). The check-in sheet was sent out, which said we would be starting in Fig, North Carolina. What’s in Fig? Not much.

We loaded the bus again for The Last Supper at The Golden Corral. With as big as our group is, the only real way to have a dinner with everyone there is to go to a buffet. No need to put in a thousand orders to the kitchen or worry about splitting all those checks. Carl and Laz went over some rules and gave information and then the line to put down the biscuit orders started. I went with two while some people ordered as many as five. We would definitely be helping the small country store make money that day!

On the bus ride back to the hotel, the map dropped! Everyone opened the map and started studying. Apparently, there wasn’t a food desert in the first 30+ miles. Services would be available often except for a few stretches of 15ish miles of nothing, but it is very easy to carry enough supplies to last 15 miles. I was extremely excited to see so many ice cream and doughnut places along the way! I love to visit artisanal or local doughnut and ice cream places, so I was pumped!



 Fig to Bristol (start to mile 50)

In the morning, we loaded onto the bus to get to the start. Within about an hour, we offloaded in Fig, where there was a community center and nothing else. Group photos were taken, one by Tim of all the Florida runners participating and the entire group of 82 who would be toeing the line. Once Laz lit the starting cigarette, we went under the Fig Tunnel, which connected one side of the road to the other and were off…for half a mile until the biscuit place.




The biscuit line was long. We started the race and immediately got into a line, haha. I think I waited for about 20 or so minutes before getting my biscuits and heading out. The biscuits were worth it and it was all part of the adventure. I heard some people grumbling about waiting in line and wasting time, but they would definitely be wasting time in so many other ways along the journey, so did it really matter in the grand scheme of things? Definitely not.

 

At mile 9, after a pretty good climb for me, we saw Laz, Carl, and Jan waiting for us to mark our time through that point. It was Payne’s Gap at the North Carolina/Tennessee state line, but marked with a paper plate that they put up. It read, “It’s all downhill from here.” Yes and no. Downhill emotionally, physically, cognitively, but it was ALL UPHILL as far as climbing went to my flatlander mind.


Our first town was at 17 miles in and called Mountain City, if that tells you anything about the terrain in the area. Then…we hit it – Highway 421. I remember seeing all of the switchbacks and twists in the road when studying the map, but I had zero idea what I was in for. There were signs that told trucks to take an alternate route rather than Hwy 421; this is one of the roads that the bus that brought us in would not have been able to travel on safely.

Highway 421 is part of The Snake (http://www.thesnake421.com/) which purports to have 489 curves over the three mountains and one valley it traverses. It is like The Dragon Tail in North Carolina, popular for motorcyclists and classic cars with all the turns, climbs, descents, and gorgeous views. Honestly, I absolutely loved this section. It was so hard. It was more climbing and descending than I’ve ever, ever done. By a lot.

The shoulders were nonexistent in most places and the sharp turns meant cars couldn’t see you a lot of the time. I hugged the guardrail more than once and luckily did not fall off into the abyss as there were big drop offs in some sections. One thing that you could see on the back of the curve signs were memorials. Stickers that said things like, “RIP Jeff” and a photo of a guy on a sporty motorcycle. There were a LOT of these. At one point three motorcycles went screaming past me, probably going at least 120mph. My heart dropped to my feet because I was so scared for them. Despite the insanity of The Snake, I knew my dad would have absolutely loved to ride it.





 


Mile 29 was an amazing stop at the Shady Valley Country Store. Inside they had shirts that said, “I survived the snake!” and I got a sticker proclaiming the same. I also got a Dr. Enuf, which is a regional soda for that area. As I opened the cooler containing it, one gentleman said to me, “That’s got all the vitamins you need!” Which are apparently Thiamine (B1 at 220% dv) and Niacin (B3 at 80% dv) and more sugar and caffeine than you can shake a stick at.

 

  


The country store had a great porch to hang out on and one of those mechanical horses for children. I saw a group of bikers near it and asked them if they would be so kind as to take a picture of me on the horse. They said yes, but they also said it should be running and take it for an actual ride. They dug around in their pockets to produce two quarters and I took a one-minute ride on that baby! See my video for the full ride.


After the country store, it was back to climb up, run downhill, switchback, curve uphill, downhill for another 10 miles before some wide highway and shoulder up to Bristol. As it was getting dark, I realized the temperature would be dropping significantly. As a lizard from Florida, I do not do very well in the cold. Anything below 70 typically qualifies as sweater weather and many of my training runs occurred while the heat index was in the triple digits. I went into a Dollar General that announced it was closing in two minutes, and panic bought a clearanced small child-sized pink blanket with rainbows and unicorns on it.

  

Bristol to Greeneville (mile 50 to 103)

Bristol straddles the Tennessee/Virginia line and a kind stranger offered to take my picture in front of the sign. It was nearing midnight, so I was able to stand in the middle of the road. At that point, I was getting pretty hungry and saw there was a waffle house up the road. I settled in and then over the next 15 minutes was joined by 10 other runners. Shoutout to the 1am Waffle House folks! Someone, I believe it was Slade, mentioned that there was a Lowes about a mile down the road and one of the display storage sheds would probably be a pretty solid place to sleep. That sounded pretty cool to me, so I tottered down that way and settled into a shed. I didn’t realize this, but the display sheds have at least one door open with the specs plastered on it and they don’t close them at night. Now I know. And many other people do now as well! Lowes sheds are pretty good sleepin’! I cuddled up in my blanket and slept for a good 4-5 hours.

 

In the morning, I passed the Bristol Motor Speedway and there was a sign that said, “It’s Bristol, Baby,” and all I could think was, “It’s Bristol, Bitch” ala Britney Spears. I cracked myself up. There I caught up to Kim Elliot and we chatted for several miles as we got into Bluff City. As we approached Bluff City I got a new song stuck in my head. Tyga has a song called Rack City (Spotify link), so going through Bluff City and far past it, my brain was stuck on a loop of, “Bluff City, bitch, Bluff Bluff City, bitch.”


A fun feature in Bluff City was the Nellie Pratt Swinging Bridge. In the pre-race email we were told that we could not run over the swinging bridge as it was not safe to do so because it may fall and have to be repaired. I looked it up and it was repaired in 2018 due to some issues at the decking, so the danger of the swinging may have been exaggerated (What?! A Laz race with an untruth? You don’t say!).


After Bluff City, we came back in to Johnson City (ROCK ME MAMA LIKE A WAGON WHEEEEEL, JOHNSON CITY, TENNESSEE – argh!). Last year at LAVS I learned that I needed to eat real meals with protein and not just high calorie snacks because it would wreck me. I stopped at Cootie Browns for some “real food” which was a half pizza and a nice margarita sour. It was good for a warm day. And I needed a break. A good one. I was already suffering a lot. Even though it was only day 2, I had somehow found the pain cave super early. I was also on my period, so in addition to the hurt feet, I had cramps, GI distress, was super emotional, and experiencing fatigue that necessitated a TON of sleep during the event. I’m still not sure if the fatigue was due to my lady times or if it was a remnant of having covid a couple weeks before (I tested positive but never had any symptoms).



Another one of the reasons the bus couldn’t drive the course was that the runners had to climb from one road onto highways in a couple of places. One of those was in Jonesborough. Basically, the route shows that you’re on a road, but then on another and you have to see that it is above as an overpass. I loved that shit. It’s so funny.

At the day 2 evening check-in, I was a mess. I had 7 miles to go before I would get the hotel I’d chosen to stay in. I was going to try and rough it for the entirety of HOTS, but the freezing weather (it was going to be in the FIFTIES overnight, no thank you!) had me wanting a hotel for both warmth and a shower. I made it into Greeneville (mile 103) around 11pm from my recollection, got a hot shower, and crashed into bed. I woke up several times in the middle of the night absolutely drenched in sweat. I remember this happening after my first couple of hundred milers. In the morning, I realized it probably was because I just did the hardest hundred miler I’d ever done before. More climbing and descending than ever and my body was freaking out. So now, after my hardest hundred miler, I still had almost 250 miles to go!

 

Greeneville to Morristown (mile 103 to 133)

I got another shower in the morning because I felt so gross. I tended to my feet and saw I had blisters on my big toe, second toe, and pinky toe of my left foot. I re-taped my pinky toe and second toe, but didn’t bother with the big toe. I didn’t pop any of the blisters since they weren’t bugging me too terribly. My pinky toe hurt the entire time and it wasn’t until 5 days after finishing and continued pain that I figured out why – I thought the blister was in the normal spot, which it was, but there was also a blister underneath the nail. The second toe blister popped without issue by itself the next day and never bothered me again. The big toe blister stayed with me the whole time and didn’t hurt. It never got worse, so I attributed it to The Snake and shrugged it off. I had a hearty hotel breakfast including my first of many, many hotel waffles and talked to several of my fellow racers that I would continue to see throughout the journey.

Leaving Greeneville that morning I nearly cried as I passed an ice cream place and a snowcone place that were closed due to the morning hour. Curses!! The sleepies hit me really hard a few hours later and I snuck under a semi-trailer for a short nap. Despite being on my back over some rocks, I slept hard. It was then that I linked up with Patrick and Kenny. They were moving really well and were focused as hell, so I figured I’d stick with them for a while. We chatted about our animals and showed each other pictures and videos of them. As a crazy cat lady, I talked about my cats to anyone who would listen and I loved hearing about other people’s pets. We saw Jan, the driver of the meat wagon, in the late afternoon.



As night fell, I realized I didn’t want to do this anymore. I was done. I didn’t have any type of fire, I felt BAD, I wanted to go home to my cats, and I had gotten enough of an adventure. In Morristown, I went about a half mile off course to a hotel and told my friends via messenger/slack that I was done and quitting. As friends do, several told me NO and that I had to keep going and few others told me it was okay to have made it 133 miles. I didn’t stop my watch or call the meatwagon. Instead, I slept for 12 hours and got back on the road late in the morning, spurred on by friends, and cursing myself for having to go back that far to get back on course where I exited it.

I’m not quite sure when, but another group came up and a Jess (there were two traveling together, I’m not sure which one asked), “Are you Shae? Is everything okay? My mom texted to ask because you only went 3 miles between last night’s check-in and this morning?” Lol, yep. Just quit for about 12ish hours, that’s all.

 

Morristown to Knoxville (mile 133 to 183), aka Quit to Quit

I was greatly rewarded by my return to the road! It was one of my few amazing and happy parts of the race. I got to see the elevated sidewalks in Morristown. They had been discussed as something we had to take and that Bob Hearn (the leader, winner of the race, and one of the most amazing multi-day runners ever) had missed and added 10 extra miles to his race because he had to go back to them. They were really cool and the whole road was so cute. Also in town was one of the greatest statues I have ever seen. And, as I was leaving I FINALLY got to hit up one of the shaved ice places and it was so perfect.


    
Road angels - people setting out things and others stopping on the side of the road!!



Oh! I also forgot to mention that at this point the road angels started showing up! They’d pull over and offer goodies like water and snacks. Getting a super cold water at a random time is so amazing. Most of the road angels that showed up had no clue about the race until they saw the front runners come through and then eventually asked someone what was going on. I don’t know how many times I explained HOTS to people. The responses I got included: “What!” “Oh, bless your heart,” “Where do you sleep?” “How far!!???” and lots of people telling me to stay safe. I suck at remembering names and taking pictures, but HUGE THANKS to everyone out there. I appreciate your kindness and generosity so much!

As I left Jefferson City in the afternoon, I realized I forgot to stop somewhere to get water. I looked at the map and saw a hospital coming up (mile 151), so I figured it was good enough to stop there and they’d probably have a water fountain. There was no water fountain in the lobby, but I went into a bathroom and filled up with sink water. Good enough for me.

I knew there wasn’t going to be any type of hotel or somewhere to stay for a good long while, so I knew I needed to find a place in Strawberry Plains (mile 161) when the sleepies would likely hit, but nothing looked suitable for a nap as I went by, so I kept going. I saw on my map there was a gas station a few miles away that closed at midnight, so if I wanted some food, I’d better get there. I got there maybe an hour before they closed and I procured a juice, chef Boyardee, chocolate milk, some water, and some Tums. Just like last year at LAVS, I had horrendous heart burn. I eat much differently at home than I can on the road, so I felt like I was dying.

Cherie, David, and another person were leaving as sat down with my things and mentioned that there was a sketchy area in Knoxville that we had to go through and one of the runners was robbed. Since that was another 10 miles away, I figured I would sleep and then go through that area between 5-8am. My brain likes to think that criminals are in bed by 5am and don’t wake up until at least 9am. I’m sure this is wrong, but please let me remain ignorant.

I tried to sleep on the picnic table at the convenience store and got maybe two hours of rest before giving up. Again, I got way too cold, so me and my rainbow unicorn blankie headed down the road. I came up on Tony, who seemed to be struggling as well, so we walked together and talked about going to the Waffle House at mile 171. It started raining, so on went the ponchos. Shortly after 5:30am we got there and ordered some breakfast. I had talked to Tony at the hotel breakfast area a couple days before and he had been having stomach issues and wasn’t eating solid food or holding it down really well. He was still having this issue, but wanted to try to eat. He ordered a huge breakfast, but had trouble with it and fell asleep at the table.

Next thing we know, Joey, Kim, and Alex came in for their breakfast and Joey passed along his hotel room key to Tony for him to get some rest. This was a perfect time to link up with them as they went through the sketchy part in Knoxville. Since the weather had turned blah and rainy, there weren’t any shady characters on the street and it was early morning, so the sketchy part really didn’t seem too bad. We went through downtown Knoxville and past the University of Tennessee (mile 178) where Joey had us do a dance party to Rocky Top.


At 10am, approx. mile 181, it really started dumping down. I was straight up drenched and at that point, absolutely exhausted. I told them go to on, I needed to get out of the rain for a while and give myself a mental reset. I looked at my map and saw about a mile and a half away there was an REI and a Whole Foods. I was envisioning a really yummy meal from their hot food bar and maybe dipping into REI for some dry socks and tape for my feet. I did buy a pair of wool injinjis at REI (that I never used for some reason) and Rock Tape (which is okay, but pales in comparison to the leukotape – I should have brought even more leuko!). The meal from Whole Foods was glorious. Holy cow, it was awesome. My feet were soaked, so I took off my socks and shoes while I ate my lunch under their awning in front. It started to absolutely dump rain down again and the forecast showed it continuing to be this heavy for at least an hour and then on and off.

I fell asleep while eating, and when I jerked awake it was still rain, rain, rain. I was mad. I was sad. I have learned that my decision-making skills and mind basically go out the window when I’m tired, but I’m too tired to realize it until later. That’s just how it is. So I decided to quit again. I’d already gone off course, so I decided to go off course even more since I was quitting. The torrential downpour kept up, but at that point I didn’t care because I was DONE. I had quit. All I needed to do was go to a hotel and wait out the storm in a lovely, warm room where I would be DRY.

The creek next to the road was full to the point of flooding, one side of the road was flooded and I got splashed on by cars, I waded through shin deep water. But hey, I was done. It was fine. I got to the hotel dripping wet and victoriously balled up my poncho and threw that mother fucker in the garbage can. I was done, I didn’t need a freaking poncho! I called Jan around 3:30pm and told her I was done. She asked what was wrong and I told her that my feet were fine, my body was fine, but mentally I was done. She told me to go to the motel I was at, make sure I kept up with the normal race check-ins, and to call her tomorrow since she wasn’t in the Knoxville area then. Okay, fine with me. I got a hotel room and was dead asleep by 4:30pm. I woke up around check-in time to put my mileage in and fell asleep. I woke up again and door dashed some food before passing out – I was too tired and didn’t get to eat it all.

In the morning I woke up to try to drop. I called Jan and she told me that there weren’t any drops overnight, so it was going to be at least another day before she could pick me up. I hadn’t checked in, so she told me to do that and call her the next day.

Okay yes, this is where a smart person would go, “But Shae, YOU’RE trying to drop. YOU were the overnight drop.” That did not occur to me at all. I was just thinking, “Yep, no overnight drops, this makes perfect sense that it’ll be a whole ‘nother day before she can get to me. Don’t want to be a bother!” This is how Jan is smarter than the runners. I knew this going in. I was told stories about how Jan doesn’t let people quit and basically forces them to keep going through the bad times. And yet, I didn’t see it at all when it was happening to me. I did fall asleep again though. In all, I slept for over 14 hours in that hotel and had quit for a total of 20 hours before I got back on the road again. Before leaving the hotel, I saw housekeeping and asked them if I could have a big black trash bag because I’d thrown away my gotdamn poncho.

 

Knoxville to Sweetwater (mile 183 to 222)

When I got back on the road again I was kinda mad. I was mad at the route. I was mad at being around all this awful civilization and chain stores and malls and people. It hadn’t started raining again and it was warm, so I had that going for me. At some point between Knoxville and Lenoir City I saw Gary, who is local, and he gave me some fritos and a drink. I went on down the road until the rain started just after mile 199 when it started to dump again and I needed to utilize my trash bag poncho. I got under a tree at Imports & More and started to struggle to make myself a hole for my face. As my face exited the bag like Jim Carey in Ace Ventura when he leaves through the back end of the rhino, a woman came up to me to ask if I wanted to come under their porch.

She said she thought my unicorn and rainbow blanket was a baby and was worried. I mean, it wasn’t an actual baby, but at this point it was my baby and I was going to keep this thing to the bitter end whether I needed it or not. It was my ride or die. I got under cover and she offered me a soda and said I could charge my phone if I needed to. She asked what in the world was going on since she’d seen a parade of crazy poncho people passing by. I explained the race and was soon joined by William C.

I took my phone out of airplane mode for a little bit to see what services would be coming up in the next town and all of a sudden Scotty (host of Ten Junk Miles, RD extraordinaire, and all-around amazing dude) called me via Facebook. I answered and was flummoxed by his call. He asked what I was up to and I told him I was doing well. I was so touched that he would reach out and surprised that I turned my phone out of airplane mode at exactly the right time! It was so nice to hear a familiar voice and especially the one that is the reason you have such an incredible community of friends and are doing crazy shit like HOTS.

The rain let up and William and I set out together, but our paces didn’t align. He was looking for a place to sleep for a few hours, so I went on ahead and then messaged him on facebook as I came into Lenoir City and saw a park that had hammocks, a gazebo, and benches.


Not too far into Lenoir City, I saw Gary again right near a car port. The sky then let loose again, screaming thunder, flashing lightning, and pissing rain. He gave me a drink and a bag of chips, so I sat under that carport to wait out the storm. If I had been even 30 seconds slower or faster and passed the carport, I would have been absolutely drenched beyond all reason. There was still rain, but I kept on going once it let up to a drizzle. 




I hadn’t really planned a stop for the night, but I met up with Dave, a fellow Floridian, along the road between Louden and Sweetwater, I’m not quite sure where. He mentioned he was going to the Rodeway Inn in Sweetwater (mile 222), so I decided to tag along and get a room there as well. It was maybe midnight(?) when we rolled into town, which was unfortunate because it was a very adorable town and I knew they had an amazing ice cream shop because Joey posted about it on facebook. So yes, another ice cream shop missed!

Now, I will say that I stayed in a lot of hotel rooms and it isn’t quite the journey I thought I was going to have. I expected to be more “feral” by staying outside and roughing it, but I was already having a rough time, so if I was going to keep going, I needed to hotel it up. I have very mixed feelings because of it. I had been looking forward to fully disconnecting from normality, but it just didn’t happen that way. 

 

Sweetwater to Dayton (mile 222 to 262)

Outside of Athens, probably around mile 232ish? I had an awesome road angel experience that was the high point of my entire journey. I saw one of the most beautiful sights you can see – a blue cooler on the side of the road. I opened it up and got a snack and sat down to munch on it and read the check-in comments from the morning and Laz’s post. As I was chilling there, a woman came out of the house across the street holding an apple and a couple clementines. I took the clementines and she offered me a cup of coffee. I could not resist and said yes. I then spent the next hour chatting with Faires Hester and her husband. We talked about how their dog adopted them, she was at the farm next door but decided the Hesters were her family, and pets, including my cats that I continued to miss so dang much. How they discovered the race was happening – they referred to their road as the “Methahoe Trail” (if I’m remembering right) – and all of the trim/slim frontrunners had them thinking they were on that type of journey rather than HOTS. Her husband grew up in the house they were living in, so he’s been in the area his whole life.

 

After an hour, I was getting ready to move on down the road, they asked me if I wanted some bear meat. I initially said no, but I’ve never had bear before and I’ll try almost anything once, so I said yes. Mr. Hester was a hunter and took the bear to a local Amish community for processing and they turned it into a kind of sausage/meat stick and smoked it. It was really good! The texture was a mix between a summer sausage and a pepperoni. As I left, I got teary eyed and was so grateful for people.

I genuinely have almost zero memories of this day. Just that there was a lot of rain and the trash bag poncho was on and off all day. I know at one point I put my feet up on the ground outside of a Dollar General as I was absolutely exhausted again, and then a few miles later I called the Ten Junk Miles Bonk Line. The funny part about calling the Bonk Line is that it’s Scotty’s actual phone number and he answered, “Is this a bonk call?” To which I replied, “Yeah,” and then explained how I was several miles from a Mexican restaurant and very hungry and I hated rain. He told me to hang up and call it again to leave a real bonk line message, lol.

I got into Decatur (mile 248) and had a nice meal at a Mexican restaurant where I charged my phone and tried to dry off just a little. I’d heard there was a pretty good climb outside of Dayton, which was the next town with a place to stay, so I made getting to a hotel my goal for the night.


A few miles before Dayton was another one of the hilarious turns that included climbing from a road onto a highway. But this time it was dark and raining. I walked back and forth trying to figure out exactly what the best route was. I looked for places where the growth, which was taller than me, had been trampled by runners, but I wasn’t seeing much. Finally, it looked like my safest bet was to climb on the rocks underneath the road. I’m not sure if it was because of the moisture in the air or the rocks just weren’t stable, but I ended up having to climb using my hands and still slipping a bit here and there before I got to the top and went out into the growth, which had been lightly trampled by runners. There was still plenty of it that was fairly high with thorns and I just laughed about the ridiculousness.

When I got onto the highway, it was after 10:30 and the sleepies began hitting hard. My feet were also killing me. Every step was pain. But what else would you expect 259 miles into a race? Even though I was only 3.5 miles from the Econo Lodge, it felt like a million miles to go. It was late and I started singing one of my favorite ultra songs. My own take on Sister Christian by Night Ranger. Instead of the lyrics:

                             Motoring

                             What's your price for flight?

                             In finding Mr. Right

                             You'll be alright tonight

 Mine are:

 

                             OVER IT

                             I want to be done

                             To stop moving my legs

                             I’ll be done tonight

 

Dayton to Dunlap (mile 262 to 302)

I got into the hotel and straight up crashed for a good 7+ hours. In the morning I was taking my time in the hotel, I really didn’t want to leave the warmth and the cozy bed. As I left, I went to a Walgreens where I bought a ball cap and proper poncho to replace my black trash bag. I noticed my sun hat was flopping and heavy due to the rain and knew a hard brim cap was the way to go based on advice from others.

Going up the mountain, which lasted forever and ever, I was offered a ride more times than I’d been on any other stretch of the road. Going up the mountain, six people stopped to offer a ride; going down the mountain, two people offered. Had this been offered to me a hundred miles ago, I would have gladly taken them up on the offer. It was so cold and just constantly raining and I must have looked downright pathetic. One gentleman in a very nice truck rolled down his window to offer and a blast of hot air hit me. That one was the most tempting. This guy had the right idea blowing his heater on full blast. Those 10 seconds of warmth were great!

 

Dusty, who’d done Vol State last year, was a road angel the previous day and had told me that he’d put a case of waters at the top of the mountain. This knowledge was so useful because there were several times that you’d think the climb would end. Instead it flattened for a bit or had a downhill, which would lead some people to think that they’d reached the top. Because I knew there was a case of water at the actual top, I knew that more climbing was necessary after the flats and downs. I didn’t know that the water wasn’t there anymore, so the relief of being at the top didn’t go away until I’d started to go downhill for a significant amount of time. That mental trick helped so much.

I stopped at another Mexican restaurant, this time around mile 274 and was treated like a leper. I just wanted to get out of the rain and eat some hot food, but everyone there, diners and employees, looked at me like a gross bug. I took my time eating there though, but the entire time I was super paranoid that someone would steal or throw away my poncho that I’d set out on their porch. When I left, my poncho was still there and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I believe the descent from the mountain started around this time. I knew via Facebook that going into Pikeville there was a nice bakery/bread store at mile 282 that had been kind to runners, so I made that my next goal where I would take a break to dry out my feet with hand sanitizer (thanks Oak for the tip!) before applying more desitin and re-taping anything that needed fixed.

When I’d looked at the map prior to the start, the stop in Pikeville seemed so silly, you go up through town and then back down even though there were better connectors. Obviously, going through the small towns is the point and Pikeville had a super cute main street, so I totally understood. There was an ice cream place and it was open, but I was so freezing that I didn’t want to lower my body temperature at all by eating something cold.

As the next hotel wouldn’t be for another 20 miles in Dunlap and the next services wouldn’t be until Dollar General another 10 miles down the road, I went to a gas station for a hot chocolate and a bunch of food. My bounty wouldn’t fit in my vest (or maybe I was feeling too lazy to put it in there?), so I carried the plastic bag. I also stopped at the Subway on the way out of town where the girls working there gave me a free cookie and I bought a sub for the road. I wasn’t hungry yet, but knew it’d be a good dinner. Y’all, I carried this plastic bag for 20 miles. It was actually a fun distraction. Yes, carrying a plastic bag helped to keep my mind off the monotony of the road and the pain.


At mile 286 I found a hat that definitely belonged to runner because it was from a 100-mile race. I posted a picture in the facebook group that I had the hat and it was coming to the rock with me. Shortly after, I got a text from Patrick, one of the guys I had been running with 150 miles ago (aka a million years ago). My vest had quite a collection of things. My rainbow and unicorn blanket, my new ball cap, a really nice zip tie (trust me, it’s a nice zip tie and I feel fully justified for picking it up off the side of the road and carrying it for 250+ miles as I’m sure to need it sometime in my life!), and now Patrick’s Massanutten 100 hat.

When I got to the Dollar General outside of Lusk (mile 293) I thought they were about to close, but it turns out I had crossed into the central time zone and they were open for another hour and a half. I got some chips and a gatorlyte to go with my sandwich and ate outside, charging my phone as well. Since I thought they were going to close, I had planned to have a short nap outside, but they were open and people kept coming and going so I didn’t feel comfortable sleeping there.

I started scoping things out looking for a good place to sleep. There was a meat company that had a fairly okay looking porch, but it didn’t feel right, so I continued on another two miles until I saw a church. It was super cold and pissing down rain, so the cover of a church porch seemed a good place as any to get an hour of sleep before pushing on. On paper, 7 miles doesn’t seem like a long way and it should be easy to get there, but in my exhausted state I had to stop for a bit. Unfortunately, it was so cold and I couldn’t get comfortable at all. I was soaking wet and getting colder by the second. I had my blanket underneath my poncho, but it wasn’t doing much. I was curled into a ball and maybe got 30 minutes of sleep. I kept moving and rolling around trying to find a good position and thought how hilarious this would be to the person who viewed their security camera the next morning. I was literally a plastic bag ball rolling around the porch. I gave up and got on the road.

 

Dunlap to Kimball (mile 302 to 333)

I arrived at the Mountain Inn & Suites (mile 302) in the wee hours of the night and was given a lovely hotel room. I slept hard and I didn’t leave until after 11am. Next door was the Dunlap Restaurant that was an ideal place for breakfast. Of course, everyone was lovely there. I had some French toast and biscuits and gravy. I met the local constable and his wife, who were following the race and he liked to take photos of the participants to post in the facebook group. After that fantastic breakfast, I walked past the county clerk’s office and a gentleman said hello, he also followed the race and was the mayor of either the county or the town, I can’t recall.

Around 1pm, I had a road angel, (and I cannot remember his name for the life of me!), that gave me a care package ziplock bag with a couple of bars and a pineapple juice, which was awesome. The sun was out this day and I reveled in it. No cold rain, just warm sun and high humidity. Heaven! At mile 310 I saw a coke machine in front of Daus Building Supply and I stopped for my first (and actually only) Sun Drop of the race. Sun Drop is the local soda in this area and something I drank constantly throughout LAVS the previous year. There was also a very adorable dog outside the business that I got to pet.


Around then, I had entered Marion County. I was looking for a “Welcome to Marion County” sign to take a photo of and post in my local running group. I live in Marion County, Florida, so I thought it would be hilarious to post it to the Marion County Runs group. Sadly, I never got a picture, but it was a fun idea.

At the Highway 28 Market (mile 317 – LESS THAN 50K TO GO!), I stopped for some food and to charge my phone. There was a woman outside of the convenience store selling homebaked goods. We talked for a bit and she sold them to supplement her social security checks. At 90-years-old she was wearing 2” heels! As many people were throughout the entire journey, she was very worried for me and my safety. She handed me her business card and told me to call her when I finished. I put it in a plastic baggy and yes, I called her the next day to tell her I finished and I was okay.

As I went through Whitwell, we were luckily diverted off the highway and onto local roads. I love local roads and seeing cute houses and towns. I decided to record a dancing video there, because others had been doing it throughout the race and I couldn’t resist. I felt so good that day, and wanted to have fun. Just after Whitwell around mile 320, a gentleman drove by and offered me a ride. I told him no, I was in a foot race (I’d heard other people use the phrase before and people understood what was going on easier than trying to go through the whole spiel). He replied, “Well, I hope you win!” I replied, “The winner won four days ago.” This emphasizes the absurdity of what I was doing and what Bob Hearn and others can do during these runs.

As I made my way through Jasper (mile 329) around 9:30pm, a guy yelled out to me, “You shouldn’t be on these roads! It’s not safe!!” I replied, “I’m good, they’re fine!” To which he responded, “No they ain’t!” Oh buddy, old pal, you don’t even know what I’ve been through the 8 days. Trust me, this section is a luxury cruise. I continued on without saying something because I’m a proper lady (ha!), but man I wanted to rip his ass because I was tired and hurting and I didn’t need someone yelling at me.

I made my way into Kimball (mile 333) where I would be staying at the Clarion. The Clarion is the headquarters of the race and where most people stay the night before we board the bus. It also has the trackers that runners pick up as they make their way to The Rock. The trackers are a fairly new addition to LAVS and HOTS. Up until a few years ago, runners would call Carl or Laz when they got to the Blue Bridge (mile 336 of the 2023 HOTS route / mile 303 of LAVS) so the pair would make sure they were there and could be there for the runner’s finish. This always proved tricky for them as some runners would go off course or take hours upon hours for those final 11 miles. The trackers allow them to see how people are moving and when they need to be ready for a runner. Last year it also helped a runner, Peter, when he went way off course, bonked to infinity, and needed some guidance and a snack before heading the right way towards the finish.

As I walked into the hotel I saw Jan in the lobby. She looked up and said, “You made it.” Yep, yep I did. She wouldn’t pick me up 150 miles ago, so there I was. I grabbed a cheese pizza lunchable and sparkling water for dinner and got into the hotel room. It was about 11:30pm and I thought I’d crash immediately and have a super early start for my final day, but my feet were going crazy! They were spasming uncontrollably. Every minute or so my legs would be kicking under the covers. Every time I got close to falling asleep my legs would jump like they’d received an electric shock. It was worrying, so I googled what could be causing it. One of the causes was electrolyte imbalance, nope, that wasn’t it, dehydration definitely wasn’t either. Overexertion and overexercising? Oh, yep, that’s the ticket. I think my legs and feet continued to spasm for another 10 minutes before I could fall asleep.

 

Kimball to The Rock (mile 333 to 347ish)

I set my alarm for 5am because I wanted an early start, but I turned that thing off and slept for another hour and a half, of course! I wanted to rush out the door, but I knew I still needed to check the condition of my feet and re-tape/lube as needed. It was only 14ish miles to The Rock, but it was still 14ish miles, including a climb up Sand Mountain and I wanted to finish in good condition.

I headed out just after 7am and texted Carl that I’d picked up my tracker and was heading out. I felt so good that morning. It was cool, but not cold, and there was a promise of warmth in the air. I stopped by a convenience store to get a breakfast sandwich and few snacks for the rest of the way and headed out. Traffic wasn’t too heavy on the short highway section, last year at LAVS it was awful, so I just trotted along because running/jogging felt good.

The Blue Bridge looked beautiful in the fog and the mist and going through New Hope was fine. Last year, I’d hit this area when it was brutally hot and it seemed to go on forever. This year I alternated running and walking, there were more small downhills than I remembered, so I took advantage of them.


At mile 341 the climb started. I remember it going on and on and on, so I braced myself for that. It would last as long as it would last and I had no choice but to keep going up up up. I felt like my hiking pace was pretty good. At the rock I found out that Laz saw that I’d picked up the tracker and figured he had more than enough time to mosey on up to the rock, but once he saw how quick my progress had been, he had to leave the hotel sooner than expected and passed me while I was somewhere climbing the mountain. Maybe it was a kind lie, but I’ll take it.


Right by the turn for Castle Rock Road, Dave and Kim pulled up, he was taking her to her car from the hotel and they cheered me on! It was good seeing some more friendly faces on that final stretch. I also came across another hat. This one for Charleston 100. I clipped it to my vest, also known as Shae’s Home for Wayward Hats, and posted it in the facebook group that I had it. There was also a road angel set up with ice cold water less than two miles from the finish and man that was great!

I crossed into Georgia and laid eyes on the field where I’d boarded a bus 10 days ago, before I knew what it was like to be wet and miserable for over 9 days. I got emotional because I really was doing it. Because I’d had such a rough time basically the whole time, this day felt so good. It was strange that it felt good to run, to climb, to breathe, to exist. And then here I was, nearing the end. I waved to my car and turned left onto the cornfield, knowing that there was maybe a mile and a half to go. After the field section, there’s a small trail section and it was then that Sandra (Laz’s wife) caught up to me in her car, and had been bringing breakfast up.

Another turn and there it was – the rock! I pranced up to the bar and hit it. 9 days, 2 hours, and 11 minutes. I was done! And in a good way this time! I hung out for a while, chatting about my experience and hearing stories of other runners from Carl, Laz, and Sandra. I told them about getting bear meat from the Hesters, and that ended up being my finisher quote.




I knew there were several other people on their way up from the Clarion and I was hoping they’d finish soon so I could talk with other finishers, but Carl looked at the tracking and said they’d be several more hours since they weren’t moving very fast. Sandra said she was planning on going down back into town for some things and offered me a ride down to my car. Since I’d stayed at the hotel and was plenty rested, I was good to take my car rather than be shuttled directly to the hotel for rest.

So there I was, back to my car and done with my journey run of awfulness. I’m a week detached from the experience, and it is already seeming like a rosy, lovely journey in my head. I know it wasn’t. It was bad, but I’m already thinking of my time fondly. I have a race I’m going to apply for next year, but if I don’t get in that race, I’ll likely do HOTS again. Because I’m a dumb dumb.

 

Some other thoughts

Being Alone

I spent the vast majority of this race completely by myself. I was with people for some stretches, but I don’t think I was with anyone for more than a few hours. I mostly stuck to my own pace and my own thing and it really never lined up with the pace that others were doing. I knew there were people around, and at one point I had just missed a few people by 5 minutes at a stop and could have caught up, but I didn’t feel that urge. That was both a help and a hindrance. Being with people helped my speed, but being with others meant that I was not taking the breaks I wanted and needed, like stopping for an hour at a local restaurant and talking with people from the area wouldn’t have happened in the same way.

It was awful being in my own head so much. It’s why I tried to quit. After the Knoxville quit, I decided I was going to listen to things to fully distract me. At that hotel, I got some audiobooks and podcasts downloaded. I listened to several great books that kept me out of my own negative thoughts and mentally engaged. Oddly enough, I listened to a story about abuse within the Amish community after having seen an Amish horse and carriage in a town and knowing the bear meat has been processed by the Amish. Strange world for sure.

Many people that I encountered were concerned for my safety. I don’t think I ever felt worried when it came to safety. Maybe I’m too trusting, but I never felt in danger. To me, the most dangerous things were the roads with drop-offs and crumbling shoulders. Had I passed through the sketchy Knoxville area at a different time of day or weather conditions, it may have been a different story, but otherwise it was all good.


Foot Care

I feel like I hit it out of the park with my foot care. Over the last several years my foot sensei Oak has imparted many bits of wisdom that have helped improve my foot care game. First of all, I wore Altra Paradigm shoes again. I did a 10.5 like I did last year, but my feet just can’t stop getting bigger. I wore a 9 when I started running and now 10 is my regular size for running shoes. If I had been doing LAVS and dealing with more heat, I may have wanted an 11 to account for the swelling, but I was fine.

Inside of the shoe where the pad of the foot/ball of the foot is had engo patches. Each foot was taped in three different places: the heel, the ball of the foot, and my pesky pinky toe. Even with Altras, I have a little bit of trouble with that dang toe! Once the rain started, it became essential to pay even more attention to the feet. I texted Oak at one point of how to remedy wet feet and he suggested hand sanitizer. I grabbed some of that and times when my feet were looking pruney, I put some of that on several times to help dry out the areas before reapplying desitin.

I applied desitin every 3-5 hours. Also, because I was staying in hotel rooms a lot, my feet had time to dry out for several hours. It still sucked when I put my dry feet into wet socks and shoes since there was never a chance for them to dry out, but I didn’t get any blisters or issues from the moisture, so I’m super grateful for that.

Also, a week later my feet are still hurting a bit. It probably didn’t help that all week I’ve tried to get at least 20k steps a day for a workplace walking challenge and haven’t really given them a lot of rest. But from everything I’ve seen from other runners, this course was brutal on people’s feet.

 

My Pack & Clothing

Most of what I brought is the same as what I brought to LAVS, but here’s the list of what I had

What I Wore:

  • XOSKIN Bottoms
  • Rabbit UPF 50 Longsleeve Shirt
  • XOSKIN Short sleeve shirt (only wore once or twice)
  • Columbia Sun Hat
  • XOSKIN xotoes (2 pair)
  • Lululemon Airsupport bra
  • Underarmor underoos (2)
  • Altra Paradigm shoes

 

What I Brought:

  • Salomon 12L Adv Skin Pack (with 2L bladder & 500ml soft flask)
  • Coros Vertix 2 watch & charger (had to charge once)
  • Headlamp 
  • Electronics (powerxcel power bank, two plug charger, cords to charge power bank and phone, corded headphones and dongle)
  • Foot kit (leukotape, scissors, engo patches, trail toes that I used a few times before switching to desitin, tincture of benzoine)
  • Toothbrush and paste
  • Anti-microbial pad for wiping pee
  • Bug spray
  • Sunscreen
  • Baby wipes
  • Combo emergency blanket/poncho
  • Emergency ziplock w/ cash, extra chargers, spare debit card, electrolytes
  • Clip on shades
  • Pepperspray
  • Misc: medications, mom & dad’s wedding rings on the chain, a small baggie of my parents’ ashes, bandana, positivity a day calendar pages

What I acquired along the way:

  • Rainbow and unicorn blanket
  • Desitin (I started with trail toes, but trust desitin more)
  • Tums
  • Hand sanitizer (for drying feet)
  • Rock Tape
  • Injinji wool toe socks (which I didn’t end up using)
  • Poncho, after throwing away my first one
  • Ball cap

Like last year, I didn’t bother using either the sunscreen or the bug spray, so I don’t know why I carried it again. When I do something like this in the future, I will take the whole damn roll of leukotape. I said the same thing after Vol State, but I mean it this time.

 

 Miles Covered

Since I did a lot of hotel sleeping and was fairly useless in the night hours, I barely covered any ground at night. I averaged 25 miles each day and 10 during the nights.

 

Mile

Traveled

Thurs 7:30pm

43

43

Fri 7:30am

63

20

Fri 7:30pm

94

31

Sat 7:30am

101

7

Sat 7:30pm

130

29

Sun 7:30am

133

3

Sun 7:30pm

157

24

Mon 7:30am

174

17

Mon 7:30pm

183

9

Tues 7:30am

183

0

Tues 7:30pm

214

31

Weds 7:30am

227

13

Weds 7:30pm

252

25

Thurs 7:30am

262

10

Thurs 7:30pm

290

28

Fri 7:30am

302

12

Fri 7:30pm

325

23

Sat 7:30am

339

14

Sat 9:41am

347

8

 

 

 

Average Day

25.1

 

Average Night

10.667

 

 

 Closing Thoughts

Overall, this journey was hard and not fun. Straight up, I did not have a good time. But I kept going and I finished. I would not have been able to do so without the amazing community of runners I know from all over the country. My local friends, my siblings, and my TJM friends were so supportive and listened to me bitch and try to quit over and over and over again. HOTS proved that you can be miserable as fuck and still move forward. My family motto is “Keep Fucking Going,” and my buddy Rob even messaged it to me a few times.

I also had my own mantra from my ride or die (my fuzzy pink blanket festooned with rainbows and unicorns) that I kept in my head – It ain’t all rainbows and unicorns. Because it wasn’t. I knew not to expect rainbows and unicorns, and that phrase kept me grounded. And now I have it on my skin permanently!


Finally, here is my collection of videos that I took during the event!



Until next year’s stupidity!!


Last Annual Heart of the South Race Report

I recorded an audio version of this race report, just in case you'd rather listen than read!  To listen to this race report, click here ...